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M A Weekly Bulletin - PARACHAT MATTOT ET PARACHAT MASS'É 10 JUILLET 2021 1 AV 5781 TAMMUZ 5781

07/08/2021 05:18:53 PM

Jul8

M.A. WEEKLY : PARACHAT MATTOT 
ET PARACHAT MASS'É
    

SHABBAT TIMES
candle lighting 8:25 pm
chabbat morning: 9 ;  am
havdalla  9:40 pm


 

 

 

 

CHABBAT PARACHAT MATTOT ET

      PARACHAT MASS’É

Nous lisons les 2 dernières parachiot du livre de Bamidbar;

 Chabbat prochain nous commençons le livre de Dévarim

Chabbat prochain c'est Chabbat Hazon 

 

Le Chabbat 10  juillet, c’est Roch Hodech Av .

 

Le jeûne de Tish’a Béav tombe le dimanche  18 juillet 

Le jeûne débute samedi soir  17 juillet  à 8:38 pm

 et se termine  dimanche soir 18 juillet   à 9:22 pm

 

                      

 Hazkara  de Olga Maslaton (ZL), mère de Solly Maslaton

                                             Et Huguette Hazan, mére de Moise Hazzan 




 

PARACHAT MATTOT EN BREF

 

Moïse communique les lois régissant l’annulation des vœux aux chefs des Tribus d’Israël.

La guerre est engagée contre Midian pour leur participation au complot pour la destruction morale d’Israël.

La Torah fait un récit détaillé du butin recueilli et de sa distribution entre le peuple, les combattants, les Lévites et le Grand-Prêtre.

Les tribus de Réouven et de Gad (rejointes ensuite par la moitié de la tribu de Ménaché) demandent que leur part de la Terre Promise leur soit attribuée à l’est du Jourdain, s’agissant d’un pâturage de choix pour leurs troupeaux. Moïse, d’abord irrité par cette demande, l’accepte sous la condition que ces tribus participent – et mènent – d’abord à la conquête des terres à l’ouest du Jourdain.

 

PARACHAT MASS’É EN BREF

Les quarante-deux étapes des enfants d’Israël depuis la sortie d’Égypte sont énumérées, depuis l’exode d’Égypte jusqu’aux plaines de Moab, sur le versant du fleuve faisant face à la terre de Canaan.

Les frontières de la Terre Promise sont indiquées et les villes de refuge sont désignées, qui serviront de lieu de protection et d’exil aux meurtriers involontaires. Les cinq filles de Tselof’had épousent des hommes de leur propre tribu (celle de Ménaché) afin d’y maintenir le territoire reçu en héritage de leur père.

Avec cette Paracha s’achève le livre de Bamidbar (le livre des Nombres), le quatrième livre de la Torah.

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 Thoughts on the parasha

From Mayer Sasson

 

Matot Masei

 

The Three Weeks

 

"And all of your children/builders   shall be taught of G-d…" (Yeshaya 54)

 

During these days "Between the straits" we mourn the destruction of the two Temples; but we also yearn and hope with all our hearts and souls that we merit very soon to the building of the third Temple in its total glory and majesty.

 

We pray with this yearning daily (after the Shmoneh Esreh prayer): "May it be Your will, G-d our G-d… that the Beit Hamikdash be built speedily in our days and put our part in your Torah."

We must look into this - Are we able to take part in the building of the third Beit Hamikdash? If so, what can we do to hasten the future Redemption?

 

We will first bring the words of our Sages ob'm in the gemara that teaches that the third Beit Hamikdash will be a building of fire, built beautifully, and it will be revealed and come down from Heaven as it says, "The Temple of G-d Your Hands have made".

All of the interpreters wonder about this: Since the third Temple will come down from Heaven beautifully built, how can the Children of Israel fulfill the positive commandment of building the Beit Hamikdash?

 

The righteous Rabbi of Alsk I'm explains in his prayer book "Lev Sameach": When a Jew prays properly and speaks properly – the Divine angels stand and saw out stones from the(se) words for the building of the Beit Hamikdash."

From his holy words we learn that when Jews pray with proper intention and properly, their prayers ascend to Heaven and the Heavenly angels cut and saw out stones of fire from the words of the prayers that serve for the building of the third Beit Hamikdash. (As we know from our Sages ob'm, letters are also called "stones".)

 

Accordingly we can understand why we pray "May it be Your will, G-d our G-d… that the Beit Hamikdash be built speedily in our days and put our part in your Torah" after the Shemone Esreh prayer, for since the third Beit Hamikdash will be built from the Torah and prayers of Klal Yisrael, we pray "May it be Your will, G-d our G-d… that the Beit Hamikdash be built – from the holy words of our prayers- and we add on and "put our part in your Torah" – that we be able to complete the building of the Beit Hamikdash by learning the holy Torah with our mouths as well.

 

That is why we begin the Shemoneh Esreh prayer with the words  "ה' שפתי תפתח" – "G-d, open my lips' – for the first two words are the initials of א ש – fire – to teach us that all the words of our prayers are "stones of fire" that serve in the building of the third Temple, speedily in our days, Amen.

And that is what our Sages ob'm said "Torah scholars make more peace in the world as it says "And all of your children/builders   shall be taught of G-d…" (Yeshaya 54) – all the sons of G-d deal in Torah and prayers and therefore they are called "builders" – because they build the third Beit Hamikdash by the words of their prayers from the "stones of fire" which will build the third Beit Hamikdash, speedily in our days, Amen.

 

Mayer Sasson

Shabbat Shalom

 





 

The last nine days of the Three Weeks, 

The mournful period before Tisha B’Av, start on the first of the Jewish month of Av and occupy a special status. During the nine days, foods traditionally associated with joy, such as wine and meat, are forbidden, The nine days culminate in the fast of Tisha B’Av, the Ninth of Av, a day that is spent entirely in mourning —by fasting, praying, sitting on stools instead of chairs and reading the Book of Lamentations. The Mishnah, in Masekhet Taanit 29b, decrees that these additional restrictions are only valid in “shavua she-hal bo,” or the week that Tisha B’Av occurs. Many Sephardic Jews observe the restrictions only within this period

 

Conflicts and resolutions from the office of Rabbi Sacks (zl)

One of the hardest tasks of any leader – from Prime Ministers to parents – is conflict resolution. Yet it is also the most vital. Where there is leadership, there is long-term cohesiveness within the group, whatever the short-term problems. Where there is a lack of leadership – where leaders lack authority, grace, generosity of spirit and the ability to respect positions other than their own – then there is divisiveness, rancour, back-biting, resentment, internal politics and a lack of trust. True leaders are the people who put the interests of the group above those of any subsection of the group. They care for, and inspire others to care for, the common good.

 

That is why an episode in parshat Matot is of the highest consequence. It arose like this: The Israelites were on the last stage of their journey to the Promised Land. They were now situated on the east bank of the Jordan, within sight of their destination. Two of the tribes, Reuben and Gad, who had large herds and flocks of cattle, felt that the land upon which they were now encamped was ideal for their purposes. It was good grazing country. So they approached Moses and asked for permission to stay there rather than take up their share in the land of Israel. They said: “If we have found favour in your eyes, let this land be given to your servants as our possession. Do not make us cross the Jordan.” (Num. 32:5)

 

Moses was instantly alert to the risks. These two tribes were putting their own interests above those of the nation as a whole. They would be seen as abandoning their people at the very time they were needed most. There was a war – in fact a series of wars – to be fought if the Israelites were to inherit the Promised Land. As Moses put it to the tribes: “Should your fellow Israelites go to war while you sit here? Why do you discourage the Israelites from crossing over into the land the Lord has given them?” (32:6-7). The proposal was potentially disastrous.

 

Moses reminded the men of Reuben and Gad what had happened in the incident of the spies. The spies demoralised the people, ten of them saying that they could not conquer the land. The inhabitants were too strong. The cities were impregnable. The result of that one moment was to condemn an entire generation to die in the wilderness and to delay the eventual conquest by forty years. “And here you are, a brood of sinners, standing in the place of your fathers and making the Lord even more angry with Israel. If you turn away from following Him, He will again leave all this people in the wilderness, and you will be the cause of their destruction.” (Num. 32:14-15) Moses was blunt, honest and confrontational.

 

What then follows is a model illustration of positive negotiation and conflict resolution. The Reubenites and Gadites recognise the claims of the people as a whole and the justice of Moses’ concerns. They propose a compromise: Let us make provisions for our cattle and our families, they say, and the men will then accompany the other tribes across the Jordan. They will fight alongside them. They will even go ahead of them. they will not return to their cattle and families until all the battles have been fought, the land has been conquered, and the other tribes have received their inheritance. Essentially they invoke what would later become a principle of Jewish law: zeh neheneh vezeh lo chaser, meaning, an act is permissible if “one side gains and the other side does not lose.”[1] We will gain, say the two tribes, by having land which is good for our cattle, but the nation as a whole will not lose because we will still be a part of the people, a presence in the army, we will even be on the front line, and we will stay there until the war has been won.

 

Moses recognises the fact that they have met his objections. He restates their position to make sure he and they have understood the proposal and they are ready to stand by it. He extracts from them agreement to a tenai kaful, a double condition, both positive and negative: If we do this, these will be the consequences, but if we fail to do this, those will be the consequences. He asks that they affirm their commitment. The two tribes agree. Conflict has been averted. The Reubenites and Gadites achieve what they want but the interests of the other tribes and of the nation as a whole have been secured. It is a masterclass in negotiation.

 

The extent to which Moses’ concerns were justified became apparent many years later. The Reubenites and Gadites did indeed fulfil their promise in the days of Joshua. The rest of the tribes conquered and settled Israel while they (together with half the tribe of Manashe) established their presence in Transjordan. Despite this, within a brief space of time there was almost civil war.

 

Chapter 22 of the Book of Joshua describes how, after returning to their families and settling their land, the Reubenites and Gadites built “an altar to the Lord” on the east side of the Jordan. Seeing this as an act of secession, the rest of the Israelites prepared to do battle against them. Joshua, in a striking act of diplomacy, sent Pinchas, the former zealot, now man of peace, to negotiate. He warned them of the terrible consequences of what they had done by, in effect, creating a religious centre outside the land of Israel. It would split the nation in two.

 

The Reubenites and Gadites made it clear that this was not their intention at all. To the contrary, they themselves were worried that in the future, the rest of the Israelites would see them living across the Jordan and conclude that they no longer wanted to be part of the nation. That is why they had built the altar, not to offer sacrifices, not as a rival to the nation’s Sanctuary, but merely as a symbol and a sign to future generations that they too were Israelites. Pinchas and the rest of the delegation were satisfied with this answer, and once again civil war was averted.

 

The negotiation between Moses and the two tribes in our parsha follows closely the principles arrived at by the Harvard Negotiation Project, set out by Roger Fisher and William Ury in their classic text, Getting to Yes.[2] Essentially, they came to the conclusion that a successful negotiation must involve four processes:

 

Then Joshua summoned the Reubenites, the Gadites and the half-tribe of Manashe and said to them, “You have done all that Moses the servant of the Lord commanded, and you have obeyed me in everything I commanded. For a long time now—to this very day—you have not deserted your fellow Israelites but have carried out the mission the Lord your God gave you. Now that the Lord your God has given them rest as He promised, return to your homes in the land that Moses the servant of the Lord gave you on the other side of the Jordan. (Joshua 22:1-4)

 

This was, in short, a model negotiation, a sign of hope after the many destructive conflicts in the book of Bamidbar, as well as a standing alternative to the many later conflicts in Jewish history that had such appalling outcomes.

 

Note that Moses succeeds not because he is weak, not because he is willing to compromise on the integrity of the nation as a whole, not because he uses honeyed words and diplomatic evasions, but because he is honest, principled, and focused on the common good. We all face conflicts in our lives. This is how to resolve them.











 

Perles de Torah sur Parachat Mattot

 

Au début de la Paracha, on nous raconte que Dieu a annoncé à Moïse qu'il devait déclarer la guerre aux Midianites, et que juste après il était destiné  à mourir.

C'était un grand dilemme pour Moïse. La guerre contre les Midianites permettrait aux juifs de rentrer plus vite en Israël, mais la conséquence de cette guerre était sa propre mort!

Cependant, comme on aurait pu imaginer, Moïse se prépare à la guerre sans perdre une seconde. Moïse est arrivé au summum de l'abnégation. Afin d'accomplir la volonté de Dieu et de promouvoir les intérêts du peuple, il précipite littéralement sa mort.

Et la réaction du peuple juif n’est pas moins étonnante. Vous vous rappelez comment le peuple s'est plaint amèrement à Moïse pendant quarante ans?  À  un moment ils étaient même prêts à le lapider! Et maintenant la Torah nous dit que ce même peuple refuse de partir en guerre afin de ne pas provoquer la mort de leur chef bien aimé. Pourquoi cette volte-face?

Les commentateurs nous expliquent qu'en réalité, ils critiquent Moïse parce qu’ils le respectaient tellement, qu'ils nourrissaient à son égard les plus grandes espérances.

C'est comme un parent qui fait des reproches à son enfant. Il l'aime tellement, qu'il ne désire que ce qu'il y a de mieux pour lui. La méthode utilisée est peut-être inappropriée, mais elle est sincère.

Et c'est la raison pour laquelle le peuple juif était prêt à boycotter cette guerre, et même à repousser leur entrée en Terre Sainte si cela pouvait prolonger la vie de Moïse. En fin de compte toutes ces réclamations, étaient bien des preuves d'amour! Essayez de vous en souvenir la prochaine fois… que quelqu'un vous critique!

 

Perles de Torah sur Parachat Mass’é

La Paracha de Massei énumère les 42 étapes marquées par le peuple juif au cours de leurs pérégrinations dans le désert. La route à suivre était tracée par les Colonnes de Gloire divines qui les accompagnaient: lorsque la colonne s'élevait, le peuple voyageait, et lorsqu'elle s'abaisse, ils plantaient leur campement. Ils ne connaissaient jamais la durée de leur séjour. À certains endroits ils campaient durant des années, à d'autres, tout juste 12 heures. Et Dieu ne leur dévoilait jamais l'itinéraire à l'avance.

Le Talmud tire un certain nombre d'enseignements de ces étapes. Et l'un d'entre eux concerne le démontage d'une structure, dans le but de la remplacer par une autre. Cet interdit est dérivé du fait que le peuple juif devait démonter et ensuite remonter leur camp chaque fois qu'ils se déplaçaient. Cependant les commentateurs se posent la question suivante: comment se fait- il que l'interdiction concernant le démontage d'une structure pendant Shabbat s'applique uniquement lorsque c'est dans le but d'en construire une autre au même endroit? Pourtant c'est quelque chose qui n'arrivait jamais dans le désert, car ils démontent le camp uniquement pour se déplacer, et donc le reconstruire à un autre endroit!

Perles de Torah par le rabbin Shraga Simmons de Aish fr.

Avant d'aborder la réponse proprement dite, imaginons la scène suivante: un enfant voyage en train aux creux des bras de sa mère. L'enfant, lui, n'a jamais bougé. Il est toujours là où il est censé se trouver, à savoir dans les bras de sa mère. En fait, il en est de même pour le peuple juif. Puisqu'il se déplaçait uniquement selon les ordres divins, il était toujours au bon endroit. Géographiquement il se déplaçait, mais en fin de compte il était toujours au même endroit, directement sous la protection Divine.

Dans la vie, notre situation change constamment, nous sommes toujours dirigés vers l'inconnu. Parfois, nous aimerions nous retrouver en terrain connu. Mais la vérité c'est que là où nous nous trouvons est toujours l'endroit parfait… car c'est Dieu qui nous y a menés.

Par le rabbin Shraga Simmons (aish.fr)



 

Matot Summary

 

This week’s parasha begins with the laws of Vows (Nedarim). Following that we read

that Benei Yisrael continued with their war to conquer the East Bank of the Jordan River. God

gives the order to attack Midian and punish them for causing Benei Yisrael to sin. (It was the

women of Midian who, on Balak’s order, seduced the men of Benei Yisrael causing them to

sin.) This angered Hashem and he brought a plague on Benei Yisrael, which ended when

Pinhas killed one of the people while committing the sin.) During the battle, they killed all the men but kept the women and children alive. Moshe was angry with them for keeping the women alive. He ordered them to kill any woman who was known to have taken part in the sin causing the plague. Hashem gives specifics on how the spoils should be distributed. We also see how

the Midianite utensils needed to be ‘koshered’ for use by a Jew. This is the basis for requiring  immersion in the Mikve for utensils acquired from a                  non-Jew today (even if never used).

 

After the East Bank of the Jordan had been captured, Reuben and Gad requested to be

allowed that portion of the land, as their inheritance (although it does not seem to have been

part of the original Promised Land). Moshe is initially disappointed in them for not wanting to go to the Promised Land but eventually he gives in and allows it on the condition that they first assist the other tribes to conquer the rest of the land on the West side. ‘Half’ of the tribe of Menashe also received a portion on the East Bank (Not really half, it was approximately

¼ because there were eight families in the tribe of Menashe and only the families of Machir and Gilead settled on the East side).


 

Matot Quiz

 

1) Q. Why did the men selected to fight against Midian not go willingly?

A. The midrash states that they knew that after they conquer Midian they would cross the

Jordan River, and they knew that Moshe would have to die first. This led them to hesitate. It is also likely that the hesitation was related to the fact that they were not accustomed to war.

 

2) Q. Why did Part of Menashe receive a portion on the East Bank of the Jordan River if only

Reuven and Gad requested it?

A. There are several opinions: Ramban explains that seeing that the land of Gilead was too

large for only two tribes, Moshe asked if any other tribes would prefer to settle there. ‘Half’ of

Menashe agreed, probably because they had a lot of flock. Haemek Davar explains that Moshe

insisted that the families of Menashe settle in the east, because no Jewish community can

maintain its existence unless it has outstanding Torah figures to lead it. The tribe of Menashe

included such people. Another opinion is that Moshe feared that the tribes on the East Bank

would be isolated from the West and fail to benefit from the greater holiness of Eretz Yisrael. By placing part of Menashe on the East Bank and part on the West he hoped that the two halves of Menashe would keep close contact, and this closeness would have a beneficial effect on Reuben and Gad as well


 

Masei Summary


 

This parasha begins with a summary of the forty-year journey through the desert. In all,

there were forty-two encampments, the first fourteen of which were before the mission of the

spies, and the last eight were in the last year, after Aharon’s death. During the thirty-eight

intervening years there were twenty journeys. Moshe explains the procedure that will take place after they cross the Jordan. They will conquer the land and drive all the inhabitants out of the land. Afterwards, they would divide the land between the tribes. Moshe also describes the borders of Israel. Next he names the leaders that will take over and lead them into Israel. The leaders were Yehoshua, Elazar (Aharon’s son), and the ten tribal princes (Reuven and Gad were not included because they were not receiving a portion of land on the West side, and Levi was not included because they don’t have a set

portion of land).


 

Masei Quiz

 

1) Q. Why does the Torah list the places where the Jewish People camped in the Midbar?

A. To show the love of Hashem for the Jewish People. Although it was decreed that they

wander in the desert, they did not travel continuously. During the span of the 38 years they

moved only 20 times.

 

2) Q. How did Aharon die?

A. The Midrash describes that he dies by "Divine kiss." No one really knows what that

means.

 

3) Q. Why does the Torah need to specify the boundaries that are to be inherited by the Jewish People?

A. Because there are certain Mitzvot that apply in the Land, but not outside of the Land.

 

4) Q. From whom did a city of refuge shelter a murderer?

A. The city of refuge was built to protect someone who murdered accidentally. The city of

refuge protected him from the Go'el Hadam (avenger of blood), a close relative of the deceased who had the right to avenge the victim's death.

 

5) Q. When did the cities of refuge begin to function as places of refuge for murderers?

A. Moshe built and separated the first three cities on the East Bank. Later, after the

conquest of the West Bank, Yehoshua separated the other three. The three that Moshe

separated were not functional until Yehoshua had separated the others.

 

6) Q. Why does the murderer remain in the city of refuge until the death of the Kohen Gadol?

A. Because the Kohen Gadol causes the Shechina to dwell in Israel and prolongs life. The

murderer causes the Shechina to be removed from Israel and shortens life. The murderer is

not worthy to stand in the vicinity of the Kohen Gadol. Alternatively, one of the functions  the Kohen Gadol is to pray to Hashem that things like this don’t happen during his lifetime.

 

7) Q. Why did the daughters of Tzelophchad marry their cousins?

A. The daughters of Tzelophchad were to receive their father’s portion as an inheritance

(because he had no sons). When a woman inherits land and marries someone from another

tribe and she has a son, the son will inherit the field and the field will move from the possession of one tribe to another. They did not want this to happen automatically in the first distribution of land so they married men from their own tribe so that the land would stay in their tribe.

Afterwards, it was allowed to marry outside the tribe and in this way some portions of land

changed from one tribe to another.

 

PROVERBES JUIFS

Si un problème peut être résolu avec de l’argent, ce n’est pas un problème, c’est une dépense

Dieu a donné à l’être humain deux oreilles et une bouche pour qu’il écoute deux fois plus qu’il ne parle

. Ne sois pas trop doux, on te mangera. Ne sois pas trop amer, on te recrachera

L’être humain se doit de vivre, ne serait-ce que par curiosité

Quand une vieille fille se marie, elle devient une jeune épouse.

C’est quand il n’y a plus rien à faire que naissent les projets les plus grandioses.

Une amitié qui a pu vieillir ne doit pas mourir.

Parle peu, et fait beaucoup.

Ne regarde pas la cruche, mais ce qu'elle contient.

Trois choses font connaître l'homme:

La bouteille, la bourse et la colère.

 

JEWISH QUOTES:

 

A child’s tears move the heavens themselves." ~~ Talmud, Nedarim

One does not keep children from school even to build the Temple." ~~ Talmud, Shabbat

"

Our sages recommended that a father should spend less than his means on food, up to his means on dress, and beyond his means for his wife and children." ~~ Maimonides

Have you ever heard of a son rejecting his mother because he found a nicer one?" ~~ Achad Ha’am

Idleness causes boredom." ~~ Ketubot 5:5

"Men worry over the loss of their possessions, not over the loss of their years—which never return." ~~ Traditional Proverb



 

If you do not aspire to great things, you will not achieve even little ones." ~~ Imre Binah

"When a man is able to take abuse with a smile, he is worthy to become a leader. " ~~ Nachman

Let not your hand be open wide to take, and clenched at a time of giving back! " ~~ Ben Sira

A man is praised upon his entry according to his attire, upon his departure according to his wit.

There is no worst ignorant than the ignorant  of his ignorance 

Be so positive that negative people don't want to be near you

 

 

THE SHABBAT SMILE

 

The Titanic is sinking and Louis and his wife Naomi find themselves in the same life raft. Unfortunately, the raft was damaged during the panic, and it is slowly sinking. To make matters worse, the water around them is ice cold; there are sharks; they have no food or drink; nor is there any kind of weapon or emergency flare on board.

After a few minutes of silence, Louis turns to his wife and says, "I suppose we shouldn't be too ungrateful, Naomi. Things could have been much worse."

"What on earth do you mean - things could have been much worse?" replies Naomi, "Are you meshugga or something? How could it be any worse?"

"Well," replies Louis, "we could have paid full price for return tickets!"

 

 

Adella Steinfeld was nearing the end of her long life. Her daughter Malka took the opportunity to discuss many things, including how Mrs. Steinfeld envisioned her last days, and even her funeral.

"Oh, honey," Mrs. Steinfeld said, "I really don’t care about the details."but don't invite my cousin Arlene

 

 

 

 

John O’Reily was a respected police officer in Chicago, but he had a strange phobia. After a while he felt compelled to visit a psychiatrist, “I dunno Doc, every time I get into bed, I think there’s somebody under it.”

“Come to me three times a week for a couple of years, and I’ll cure your fears,” says the shrink.

“How much do you charge Doc?” asks the cop.

“My discount rate is only $200 a visit.”

The police officer says he’ll think about it.

Six months later, the police officer runs into the psychiatrist, who asks why he never came back.

“You know that Jewish butcher at Izzy’s Deli?” says the cop. “He cured me for $10.”

“Is that so! How?” asks the psychiatrist.

“He told me to cut the legs off the bed.”



 

Herman and Harriet Epstein were sitting on the couch at home staring at each other. Recent empty nesters, this was not an uncommon occurrence.

Harriet got up from the couch and went to the mirror and started staring at herself.

“I don’t understand,” she said. “I’m only 50 years old but I look like I’m over 60. My face is all wrinkly, my back is bent over, and my hair is starting to thin!”

Herman turned to Harriet and said, “Look on the bright side. At least your eyesight seems to still be working fine!”

 

 

 

LE SOURIRE DU CHABBAT

Au restaurant, Monsieur Dupont s’écrit :

– Garçon, il y a une mouche qui nage dans mon assiette.

– Oh, c’est encore le chef qui a mis trop de potage. D’habitude, elles ont pieds !

 

 

Deux gars discutent :

– Tu ferais quoi si aujourd’hui, c'était la fin du monde ?

– je tirerais sur tout ce qui bouge et toi ?

– Je ne bougerais pas



 

C'est deux fous qui marchent dans la rue. Le premier demande au second : Je peux me mettre au milieu ?



 

Deux amis se rencontrent. L'un, joueur invétéré dit à l'autre 

 

- Il faut que je t'annonce une grande nouvelle : j'arrête de jouer ! Plus de casino, plus de tiercé, plus de poker…

 Bravo, lui dit l'autre. Mais pardonne-moi, te connaissant, j'ai du mal à y croire. Je suis même sûr que tu ne tiendras pas !

- Ah bon    , tu paries combien 


CHABBAT CHALOM      MAGHEN ABRAHAM   David Hasson

 

 

 

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Sun, November 28 2021 24 Kislev 5782